Gratitude and Generosity
Grace begets gratitude, which, in turn, widens our hearts toward greater goodness and love. Diana Butler Bass
Gregg’s Reflection
One of the major milestones of my spiritual journey was the dawning of a grateful heart. It didn’t come in a flash, but I noticed it more as a tipping point in my journey. It was decades after I was baptized, and came after we sold the business. I was so busy trying to prove myself before then, and took credit for everything good in my life.
After I left the business world, and began serious discipleship, I began to realize things. I am a member of the lucky sperm club, born the son of an entrepreneur, in Atlanta, during the time of greatest economic expansion the world had ever seen. And, I was born white and had access to the best schools, with a career in the family business without my even trying.
I am 6’7”, and height correlates to more success in the business world. Even if I’m smart, I didn’t put the brain in my head. In a word, I discovered privilege. And once I saw it, I couldn’t unsee it. Now I see the vast majority of the world lives in poverty, has little access to education or capital to get a leg up in the world.
When I looked at all that had advantaged me in my life, none of that was of my doing. Now, ambition, perseverance and a short temper were traits my father discipled into me. They have served me well. Maybe not the temper.
We live at 9000 feet in the Front Range of Colorado now. The trailheads to climb most 14ers out here are generally around 11,000 feet. You have to ascend 3000 feet or more to say you’ve bagged a 14er. Think how much easier it is to climb from a trailhead at that elevation rather than starting at 5280 feet in Boulder. So, it is incredibly easier to reach the peak when you start at 11,000 feet.
My point is I was born halfway up the mountain of success. I didn’t have to climb out of poverty and great disadvantage. As I realized those things, a grateful heart slowly began to emerge. I began to see the role of grace in my life. I saw I could never have been able to leave business at age 48 and not have to work again if I hadn’t been dropped off halfway up the mountain.
So, now I live in the present moment.
I am approaching the time of life an old mentor described in this way, “I don’t even buy green bananas anymore.” I enjoy good health, the love of a wonderful spouse I married when she was 18, have great relationships with my two children, their spouses and our four grandchildren. (Taking each of them on a 10-year-old trip cemented those relationships.) I have wonderful relationships with next generation pastors and professionals from the leadership/life coaching I’ve done for in my calling and second career. And, so far I’m still a sentient being.
At the end of this year, I will have spent 25 years living into my calling, to equal the 25 years I spent in the family business. We live in an off grid log home surrounded by nearly pristine wilderness. Yet, with Starlink, we have a connection to the world that lets us stay in touch, to our hearts’ content. We’ve traveled to South America and Africa, and some of the happiest people we’ve ever seen live in poverty. A grateful heart is the key to my joy.
Here’s a short audio introduction:
Journaling Prompts
How do you see Grace impacting your life? What is the relationship between gratitude and joy? How would you have to see things differently to usher in the dawning of a grateful heart in you life?
Scripture
When you reap the harvest of your land, do not reap to the very edges of your field or gather the gleanings of your harvest. Do not go over your vineyard a second time or pick up the grapes that have fallen. Leave them for the poor and the foreigner. I am the Lord your God.
Leviticus 19:9-10
One person gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.
Proverbs 11:24-25
Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this, says the Lord almighty, and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.
Malachi 3:10
Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back.
Luke 6:30
God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all that there were no needy persons among them. From time to time those who owned land or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales and put it at the apostles feet, and it was distributed to anyone who had need.
Acts 4:33-35
Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
Romans 12:13
What do you have that you did not receive? And if you received it why do you boast as if it were not a gift.
1 Corinthians 4:7
The driving energy force behind the Christian life is gratitude or Thanksgiving. Grace and gratitude make up the rhythm of Christian identity and practice. To “abound” means “to overflow.” The Christian’s response is not a trickle, but a gushing forth of joyous gratitude.
RENOVARE Bible notes on Colossians.
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Ancient Writings
He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.
If the only prayer you say in your life is “Thank You,” that would suffice.
Meister Eckhart. Christian Mystics Matthew Fox, p. 52
Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.
Modern Writings
Grace and gratitude belong together like heaven and earth. Grace evokes gratitude like the voice of an echo. Gratitude follows grace like thunder lightning.
Karl Barth, Church Dogmatics, 4.1
Every time we decide to be grateful it will be easier to see new things to be grateful for. Gratitude begets gratitude, just as love begets love.
Henri Nouwen, Life of the Beloved
Our freedom from the prison of our own illusions comes in realizing that in the end everything is a gift. Above all, we ourselves are gifts that we must first accept before we can become who we are by returning who we are to the Father. This is accomplished in a daily death to self, in a compassionate reaching out to those in need, and in a detached desire for the silent, ineffable surrender of contemplative prayer.
James Finley, CAC Daily Devotion 6/15/20
Gratitude is the awareness that life in all its manifestations is a gift for which we want to give thanks. The closer we come to God in prayer, the more we become aware of the abundance of God’s gifts to us. We may even discover the presence of these gifts in the midst of our pains and sorrows. Thus gratitude becomes a quality of our hearts that allows us to live joyfully and peacefully even though our struggles continue.
Henri Nouwen, Nouwen Society Daily Devotion 7/1/20
Gratitude...goes beyond the “mine” and “thine” and claims the truth that all of life is a pure gift. The discipline of gratitude is the explicit effort to acknowledge that all I am and have is given to me as a gift of love, a gift to be celebrated with joy. Gratitude as a discipline involves a conscious choice. I can choose to be grateful even when my emotions and feelings are still steeped in hurt and resentment. The choice for gratitude rarely comes without some real effort. But each time I make it, the next choice is a little easier, a little freer, a little less self-conscious. . . . There is an Estonian proverb that says: “Who does not thank for little will not thank for much.” Acts of gratitude make one grateful because, step by step, they reveal that all is grace.
Henri Nouwen, Nouwen Society Daily Devotion, 7/2/20
True spiritual gratitude embraces all of our past, the good as well as the bad events, the joyful as well as the sorrowful moments. That does not mean that all that happened in the past was good, but it does mean that even the bad didn’t happen outside the loving presence of God. . . . Once all of our past is remembered in gratitude, we are free to be sent into the world to proclaim good news to others.
Henri Nouwen, Nouwen Society Daily Devotion, 10/14/20
Gratitude is a Quality of the Heart
Gratitude is the awareness that life in all its manifestations is a gift for which we want to give thanks. The closer we come to God in prayer, the more we become aware of the abundance of God’s gifts to us. We may even discover the presence of these gifts in the midst of our pains and sorrows. The mystery of the spiritual life is that many of the events, people, and situations that for a long time seemed to inhibit our way to God become ways of being united more deeply with him. What seemed a hindrance proves to be a gift. Thus gratitude becomes a quality of our hearts that allows us to live joyfully and peacefully even though our struggles continue.
Henri Nouwen, Nouwen Society Daily Devotion, 7/1/23
When our losses are pure fate, our gains are pure luck! Fate does not lead to contrition, nor luck to gratitude.
Henri Nouwen, Nouwen Society Daily Devotion, 10/15/23
Teilhard de Chardin’s Thanksgiving Examen. . . .
To give thanks in general to God our Lord for the benefits received in your life, in others, and in the world today.
To ask for grace to recognize all those particular things that happened to you and others that you should personally be grateful for.
To take account of your day from the hour that you arose up to the present time, hour by hour, or period by period: first your good thoughts, ideas, and intentions; then your good words spoken and heard; and then good acts, your actions and those of others, small or large, that positively touched your life or the life of someone else. Record these in your journal.
To praise and thank God our Lord for all the opportunities you had to make a difference in the world today and to inspire you to recognize more and more such opportunities in the future.
To thank God for all God has done for you, and to ask yourself: What can I envision doing that would lead me to be even more deeply grateful? Close with a prayer with deep significance for you.
Louis M. Savary, The New Spiritual Exercises: In the Spirit of Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, p. 49–50.
Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.
Generosity is simultaneously a moral and a material imperative, especially among people who live close to the land and know its waves of plenty and scarcity. Where the well-being of one is linked to the well-being of all. Wealth among traditional people is measured by having enough to give away. Hoarding the gift, we become constipated with wealth, bloated with possessions, too heavy to join the dance. . . .
I don’t know the origin of the giveaway, but I think that we learned it from watching the plants, especially the berries who offer up their gifts all wrapped in red and blue. The berries are always present at our ceremonies. They join us in a wooden bowl. One big bowl and one big spoon, which are passed around the circle, so that each person can taste the sweetness, remember the gifts, and say thank you. . . . The generosity of the earth is not an invitation to take it all. Every bowl has a bottom. When it’s empty, it’s empty. . . How do we refill the empty bowl? Is gratitude alone enough? Berries teach us otherwise. . . . The berries trust that we will uphold our end of the bargain and disperse their seeds to new places to grow. . . . They remind us that all flourishing is mutual. We need the berries and the berries need us. Their gifts multiply by our care for them, and dwindle from our neglect. We are bound in a covenant of reciprocity, a pact of mutual responsibility to sustain those who sustain us. And so the empty bowl is filled. . . .
The moral covenant of reciprocity calls us to honor our responsibilities for all we have been given, for all that we have taken. It’s our turn now, long overdue. . . . Whatever our gift, we are called to give it and to dance for the renewal of the world.
Robin Wall Kimmerer, Braiding Sweetgrass: Indigenous Wisdom, Scientific Knowledge, and the Teachings of Plants, p. 381, 382, 384.
Grace begets gratitude, which, in turn, widens our hearts toward greater goodness and love.
Diana Butler Bass, Grateful: The Transformative Practice of Giving Thanks, p. 19–20
Gratitude and generosity are similar virtues, but they differ in that gratitude is an internal characteristic and generosity is our external expression of our sense of gratitude. Basically, gratitude is how we feel, and generosity is how we express that feeling out in the world. . . .The defining difference between effort and effortlessness is the virtue of gratitude. But why is gratitude such a core concept of joy, contentment, and well-being in our life? The ancestors tell us there are two primary reasons. The first is that a person cannot exist in a place of fear and true gratitude at the same time. The second is that gratitude is the doorway to divine intuition, which allows us to be guided by our connection with the Creator. The simple act of practicing gratitude disrupts negative thoughts and changes our mindset to see the world in a positive way. Not only are we more attractive to others when we live in gratitude, but the most ordinary things can become extraordinary, creating a fuller, more beautiful expression of our life.
Doug Good Feather, Think Indigenous: Native American Spirituality for a Modern World, p. 27, 30, 31
THE SCIENCE BEHIND GRATITUDE
When we feel grateful, we feel good. Why is that? "When we feel gratitude, it boosts the neurotransmitter serotonin and activates the brain stem to produce dopamine," explains psychotherapist Dr. Lee Phillips. "Dopamine is the chemical that makes us feel pleasure and grateful thoughts." Meaning the more grateful we feel, the better we feel.
Studies have shown that regularly practicing gratitude lowers depression, decreases stress and anxiety, and even helps improve heart health. Regularly practicing gratitude helps rewire the way we think and perceive things. "Our brain is always changing based on our thoughts and behaviors," explains Mike Laauwe, founder of PositiveThinkingMind.com. "Regularly expressing gratitude creates new neural pathways, making your brain more attuned to positivity. Over time, this rewiring and consistent gratitude practices lead to a more optimistic perspective."
As Lee explains, this mindset shift also leads us to better care of ourselves. Proper sleep hygiene, keeping up with doctor's appointments, eating well, exercising, and expressing kindness and love to others are all results of regular gratitude. "Overall, the benefits of gratitude act as a motivator for accomplishing your goals in life," he says.
Danielle Page, How a thankful mindset enhances overall well-being.